Dating a single mom can be tricky. Trust. I'm well aware. If you're a single parent, chances are our schedules will NEVER line up. Because I'm the custodial parent and you, most likely are not, I'll be kidfree every 1st and 3rd weekend f the month and you'll have your kids then. You'll be kidfree the other 90% of the time that I am not.
If you're not a parent, it's high likely you want to be and I'm about 85-90% sure I don't want more. Its not totally off the table, but I'd have to be earth shakingly, madly in love, head over heels, I hear chimes when you speak kind of love to go through the zero to three phase again. I've JUST made it to the flipside. Starting over would make me a masochist. However; I'm open to the conversation (but please don't bring it up) LOL
If you're not a parent and you don't want to be- SCORE! Now, we just have to work out how to get to know each other as adults first, then slowly introduce the two minions without causing the knee-jerk reaction that may happen once you realize there are real humans involved outside of me. So, if "they" don't scare you and you're all about getting to know mom, there are ground rules.
First, try to work around her schedule regarding free childcare. Whether that's coffee or lunch while they're in school, or dropping over for wine after kids are asleep. Trust me- she wants the company.
Second, offer to pay for the babysitter! I get asked out 3-5x a week. Each night could be an average for 4 hours at $15-20hr thats about $80-100 EACH time I go out and costs almost as much as a month of preschool. That's why I never go out! LOL The argument from the gentlemen's side is, "I'm supposed to pay for the babysitter AND the date?" My answer to that is, "Plan a free date!" Mom wants to get out. She probably also wants to get to know you so if you offer to pay for the sitter, you're already way ahead of the game.
"Free" or low budget dates may be:
Open your mind a bit further, too...dating a single mom often means you've found a bad ass! Shes likely tougher, more independent, knows how to prioritize, manage her time, think for herself (and 2-3 others) and is most likely just looking for companionship. Sure, there's professional husband hunters out there who are looking for some schmuck to take over the bills and "man" duties, but that woman is easy to spot and avoid. That's not all of us!
Some women who decide to date after divorce, or failed love, is simply this: They realize it wasn't love to begin with. They have a strong desire to love and be loved and share the joys of their precious little ones with someone who can open their heart and mind to them too. They want another adult around to talk to, laugh with, go out with, and be affectionate with. Parenting is draining mentally, emotionally, and physically, and just the knowledge another adult has your back outside of the parenting gig is enough to make things significantly easier!
She wants love and a partner she can trust.
Parenting expert, blogger, inventor, single mom to twins, barefoot nomad, adventure seeker, boho spirit, advocate of play